I think one of the greatest gifts God gives us here in mortality is
the ability TO KNOW. Knowing who we are, where we come from and how eternally important we are, is the greatest source of strength and happiness available to us all. Because we are mortal, sometimes we don't feel all the good things we may desire. We may not feel important or feel like we are enough or feel like anyone really understands. But we can KNOW it.
We can KNOW who we are. We can KNOW God is our Father. We can KNOW how infinitely important we are to Him. And when we know...
well, that's really all we need to know!

Last night my husband fell asleep on the couch. Three months ago that was a very unusual thing. Not so much anymore. I forgot there was something I needed his help with that needed to get done before today. So when I woke him up to move to our room I asked if he could help me. As tired as he was, he said, “You bet.” A seemingly small sacrifice, but for any exhausted person, there is nothing small about it.

I am understanding more and more why marriage is an essential part of our eternal existence. There are certain things we can only learn through committing our whole selves to another person. Marriage gives us the opportunity to develop traits and virtues that we can really only develop through unconditional sacrifice and love. As human beings, we don’t naturally posses the ability to unconditionally sacrifice and love. This is what makes marriage so difficult, and yet, so wonderful. It brings us the opportunity to give of ourselves more fully, more selflessly and more willingly. And there are two main reasons it does this. #1: We love this person more than anything else in the world. This drives us to make them happy and do things we may not otherwise do. #2: We have committed our life and our heart to this person. We promised to stick with them. This is the part that holds us together. It means that even when we don’t feel in love or don’t see their way or don’t want to do something, we still do it. Because we said we would. It’s not huge sacrifices and big expressions of love that normally make the difference.  It’s the willingness to live everyday (and night) for the well being of another. The little things that, at times, are really the biggest of all.

Life is so precious. 

Love is even more precious.

Each night I have the privilege of putting my sweet baby to bed. I cherish the few moments we share of whispering, cuddling, small hugs and kisses. I'm so glad she is mine. Tonight as I laid her in her crib my heart overflowed with love and gratitude for the blessing I have to be her mother. I believe it's only a glimpse of what our Heavenly Parents feels for us...

but what an awesome glimpse it is.

This week I went to get my new Driver's License. After working with the woman for about 35 minutes she printed off my temp license and asked me to sign it. I reviewed it and came across this, "Sex: M". 

I have never been mistaken for a male before. I guess I am more masculine looking than I thought!

Today two really great things happened. Well, three.

Great Thing #1
My daughter ate all her breakfast, lunch and dinner.
That is not normal and it was wonderful!

Great Thing #2
My daughter has come to love Dora. The only place she really knows Dora from is Netflix. She will watch it here and there for about 5-10 mins. So she isn’t super into watching it, but loves to say “Dowa.” It is so precious. The other day I was at the dollar store and there was a small blue ball with Dora on it. She pointed to it and said, “Dowa!” So I handed it to her and she held it for several minutes and hugged it against her chest and rocked it like a baby. I had never seen her do something like that, so I had to get the ball. Now we had 1 Dora thing in our house. Over the past few weeks I have been looking online and keeping my eyes open for a little Dora figure. Hoping I could find one for a few bucks since she likes Dora so much and loves playing with little figures. Yesterday I finally ran across one! It came in a pack with a 2nd figure that had blonde hair and blue eyes. I was so excited because I really thought my daughter would love this. So tonight when my husband got off work we met up, picked up the figures and I headed to a church activity and he came home to be Dad for the night. When I arrived at the church I called him to see how things were going. He said she LOVED her new little figures and was carrying them all over and playing with them and talking with them. I could just picture her cuteness in my mind and was so satisfied and happy that she loved them so much.

Great Thing #3
Tonight we had a Service Auction with the women from our church. It was awesome. I enjoyed being with friends and meeting new people, and mostly basking in the goodness of those around me. Everyone brought something to share. Whether it was an offer for a ride or babysitting, cooking, tutoring, teaching, arts, crafts...a whole variety of goods and talents were offered for no cost. Not only was I impressed at all the talent and willingness to serve, but I was struck at how wonderful each person was and how different we all are. We all have different tastes and styles, we all enjoy different activities and have different abilities and hobbies. We are all driven by different goals and interests and each person is wonderful and beautiful...and equal. I sat in that room thinking how much each person means to this world, how much each person adds to this world and how not one person is more important than the other. We all have different things to offer...but not one person matters more than another. It isn’t about a better or a worse or any kind of comparison. It’s about finding who you are, what you like, what you hope and following it. Being it. That is one of the reasons this world is such a wonderful place...so many different people, so much good to be shared. I’m grateful for the chance I had to be surrounded by so many wonderful women. Thank you to everyone who was there! (And to the men who watched the kids.) I hope you know you are great.

I have never considered myself a really creative person.

I'm not good at things with my hands...and I don't have a very wild imagination. So trying to come up with new ways to build blocks for my daughter is not my strong point. I have managed to pretend I have built a garage for her animals or cars, a building, a tall tower and most recently a swimming pool (basically a square with as much blue as possible). We like to build the pool then put together some blocks to look like stairs which creates a diving board. Then we walk her Elmo and Cookie Monster and Barney and all their friends up to the top and they jump into the pool. Today I decided to get creative. Instead of building the typical square or rectangular shaped pool, I was going to do a diamond. So I started putting the long pieces together at diagonals and for a few minutes built up my diamond and was excited to show her this new shape. 

It was looking pretty good...

 

Then my daughter bumped it and I realized...it was a square.

I felt...amazing. 

Guess I used all my brain power trying to be creative and didn't have any left for common sense!

Over the weekend I had a photo shoot, which we did at the beach at sunset. I went ahead of time to scout out spots and after I had climbed around on some large rocks a guy who was obviously a biker and had just parked his bike right near where I was, came up to me and said, “So you’ve seen the Sea Rats! Pretty amazing.” I was not totally sure what he was talking about and said, “Actually, no! What are those?” He continued to tell me all about the Sea Rats and how large they are and that they come out just after sun down, typically from under all the rocks I had just been climbing on. I am sure glad I hadn’t run across one and I sure don’t like rats...but I was excited to learn something new about the island and even hoped they would come out while I was there so I could see what it was like. After talking for a few minutes I asked this man if he was from the island. He spoke very fast with a lot of energy and told me he had just come to the island and back in 1950 something he was born in Wisconsin. I interrupted him and said, “That’s where we just moved from!” He then told me all about coming to the island and how one month ago he had biked all the way from Green Bay to the island and was now living here and had gone to the father and wiped his slate clean and about the woman he met here and how she owns a cabin in Wisconsin and all about his biking and everything. It was Awesome. I told him the way he had come was much cheaper than the way we had come, and that it was amazing he rode his back all that way! As we continued to talk I enjoyed his upbeat tone and enthusiasm for life and the energy that he had. I was amazed at his ability to bike that far and though it may sound weird, I really cared about this guy. I wanted to know him more. I wanted to say, “Come to our house for dinner and hang out and tell us more!” But as quickly as he had popped into my life, he popped back out. And of course, I hadn’t said anything of the sort.
Sometimes I wish we didn’t live in a world where it would be weird to give him a hug and say, “You are awesome, let’s hang out.” And sometimes I wish I just wouldn’t care what the world thinks and could just have the courage to grab someone, give them a hug and tell them, “You are awesome, let’s hang out.”  Either way, I thought this man was awesome and I truly do hope he is happy and knows how great he is. I hope I run into him again. And I hope I can have more courage to say what I feel to strangers, because there really are so many good people in this world and everyone deserves to know it.

P.S. After the sunset the rats did come out. Yes, they were huge and ugly and gross...but it was pretty awesome to see this little part of nature play out it’s role in this great, big world. And the best part was letting our kids run free once the pictures were done!

Home Sweet Home

 

I finally got around to (almost) finishing the decorating in our house. There was a couple boxes of things I still wanted to use, with only our bedroom left. I typically like a lot of wall showing because I don't like it to feel too busy or crammed. But as I laid all the things on my bed that I still really wanted to use, I decided I was going to use them all! I debated over several possibilities and then decided to just start arranging them on my bed, as if it was the wall. This is what I got. And though there may be some uneven spaces and unbalanced sections...I love that every time I walk in my room I think of my wonderful husband and daughter. They are my family. They are my life. And I sure am glad I get to keep them forever!

Getting the good stuff down our kids can often be a challenge. A couple months ago I ran across a recipe for Green Smoothies that is made of spinach and fruit...and my daughter LOVES it! The first time I gave it to her I put it in a fun little cup, she took one sip and didn't take her mouth off until it was gone. Then I put more in a normal cup and she did the same thing. She sucked that straw until it was gone! It's always exciting to find something that you and your child love, especially when it's healthy. There are variations of the recipe from the blog I found it on, and we have changed it up a little for our desired taste, too. 

This is what I do:

Fill up the blender with fresh baby spinach, some water & pineapple juice. Blend. Add 2 bananas & 2 yogurts (6oz size), Blend. Add 4 slices of canned pineapple or about a cup of frozen pineapple. Add about a cup of Frozen Mixed Fruit - the mix I use has Mangos, Peaches, Pineapple and Strawberries. Sometimes I add a Frozen Mixed Berry Blend that has Raspberries, Blackberries and Blueberries. Though this makes it a pink smoothie, not a green one. Blend it all together, Pour and Enjoy! (Sometimes I add ice as well, depends on how you like it!)

My baby is growing into a girl.

Today we were out playing and she happily ran around in her own little world. She didn't need me to be next to her or hold her hand (most the time.) She excitedly explored the giant world around her and took it all in by feeling, tasting, looking, grabbing and playing. She didn't judge it or mock it or care what it looked like...she just enjoyed what it had to offer. As I watched her stand on her toes to reach over a wall and carefully study each item she found, I was reminded that she truly is her own little person. All her own thoughts, feelings and desires. Just like me, but in a small body that can't do all it wants. How much she needs my love. How much she needs me to show her what she's capable of. How much she has to learn and understand. And yet, how much she gives to me. How much she loves and forgives and trusts. How much she is, that I need to become.

Yesterday I walked outside to bring our garbage can in and ran right into this! These are my favorite clouds. The ones that send big streams of sunlight shooting across the sky. When I was little I named them Second Coming clouds, because they made me think of what it will be like when Christ comes again. Now every time I see them I think of that. And every time I see beautiful formations of clouds and lights and colors stretching across the sky, I can't help but smile. It is beautiful. This world is so beautiful. I especially love clouds and sunsets. I love sunsets along the beach, in a city, behind the mountains, in my backyard...anywhere. Not a single one the same, each it's own unique beauty. Truly the art of our Master.

Other beautiful moments 

(when I actually had my camera)

    

    

    
 
 
    


   

    
  
 
 

     

 
 

I love this man!

This morning I woke up to that awful sound...an alarm. Alarms aren’t as awful as they used to be, because normally they aren’t for me. (My daughter is typically my alarm.) Even though I knew it wasn’t for me I kept thinking, ‘Turn it off!’ I felt my husband fumbling around and wondered why it hadn’t gone off yet. All of the sudden my husband starting poking me with his finger. He poked me several times and I suddenly realized he thought I was his alarm. Literally. He was poking me as if to turn me off! But it didn’t work. I laughed and said, “Why are you poking me?” He realized I was not his alarm & turned his real alarm off. As a wife I have taken on many different roles, but I had never been my husbands alarm before. I guess today was my lucky day!

More than ever I have come to understand the role of a man and a woman, father and mother. When I first got married I felt more womanly than I ever had. There was something about having a man adore and love me and treat me like a woman. It made me feel more feminine. It helped me realize my divine role as a woman. We were married for a few years before we had a baby and in those few years I at times, questioned my role and at times, gained a better understanding of my role. Then our beautiful daughter was added to our family and our roles became significantly more important. We now had the stewardship, responsibility and privilege...to take care of her. To love her and teach her and provide her with a wonderful life. The first year of her life we were able to spend quite a bit of time together. We were able to share most of her firsts together and sharing parenthood was so special. Then a few months ago my husbands work intensified and now sometimes it feels like we hardly even see him. Parenthood quickly became me living it and him hearing about it (and of course, seeing tons of pictures and videos). At first, this was very difficult. I knew this stage would come. I had been trying to mentally prepare myself, but it was still hard. Motherhood was my greatest joy and I loved being home with our daughter and I loved sharing it with Rick. I knew all we needed was some time to transition into this new phase and it would be awesome, but during that time of transition I spent alot of time trying to figure out my role and his role and how we were to make it work best. 

My whole life I have believed in Family and that Family is First. I am SO grateful to be married to someone who feels the same. I have read over and over The Family Proclamation and believe in it with all my heart. I have never doubted my role as a woman and his as a man. To me, it all just makes sense. It just feels right. But over the past few months as my husband has been gone long days and lots of nights, I have thought about these roles more and more. I realized, he is gone because he is fulfilling his role. That is exactly what he should be doing. And that is what I want him to be doing. I realize it works a little differently for every family, but for ours, this is the path we have chosen and we have felt it is exactly where we should be. As for my role, I have thought a lot about the word Homemaker. I am the maker of a home. Of our home. When Rick and I got married I remember my dad telling us that we would now be the creators of a home. That it was our world to create. Back in 2008 President Uchtdorf gave an awesome talk in which he says, "But to what end were we created? We were created with the express purpose and potential of experiencing a fullness of joy. Our birthright - and the purpose of our great voyage on this earth - is to seek and experience eternal happiness. One of the ways we find this is by creating things."

As a mom, I am a creator. Not only a creator of life, but a creator of the world within our home. And though we share this role as husband and wife, mom and dad - as the mom, it is my main privilege and duty to create and provide a good 'world' for my little family. And there is nothing else I would rather be doing. There is nothing I find greater joy in. I am not only honored to be given this role, but I am happy each day I have to live it.

I'm so grateful for children's Ibuprofen and a full nights sleep!

Sometimes it's important to just let everything go.

 

Great Talk:
The Race of Life